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Friday, October 26, 2007

Saving Marriage

Photo by J. Stewart
I was thrilled to find an article and an interview on CNN.COM from Award-winning Journalist, CNN Contributor, and Radio Talk Show Host Roland Martin about saving marriages. He has hit it right on the nose religiously, secularly, and statistically in his commentary on marriage and divorce. Our pride and society may claim otherwise, but the facts cannot be denied.

Some of what he has stated are topics I have also covered in this blog. It is not because we are in agreement that I am blogging about him today. It is because he said it so much better than I did, and his commentary is so much more fact-driven than emotion-driven. I feel perhaps sending you, my lovely readers, to his article and interview will help explain and support the points I have been making; but in a much more clear and effective way.

He points out that many are just too quick to exit a divorce at the first sign of trouble rather than trying to make it work. His statements about his own divorce in his first marriage is thought-provoking. He uses the movie “Why Did I Get Married” to illustrate some of his points.

From an LDS perspective, our leadership has also said the same things on the topic of marriage and divorce. The ongoing theme is that the answer to marital woes is not divorce except in the rarest of circumstances such as in abuse. Over and over members are urged to develop in themselves those qualities of selflessness, forgiveness, compassion, and tenderness which will make them a better spouse to their partner. The focus is on improving self and developing solid communication skills, rather than blaming the spouse or trying to make them change to suit ourselves.

Enriching Your Marriage

The Women in Our Lives

What God Hath Joined Together

What can be learned from all of this can be and should be applied in our approach to dating. If we prioritize developing strong partnership skills in ourselves, and seek out those to date who have those same skills, our chances for finding a partner with whom we can create a happy, healthy, and lasting union increase exponentially. Above all else, we must be absolutely committed to the vows me make of being a loving partner and of sticking it out. Some of my own blogs on the topics may be found here:
Communication and Selflessness: The Heart of a Happy Eternal Union

Celestial Dating

Roles and Responsibilities

The Change in Family Values and its Effect in Dating

What have your own experiences been in marriage and divorce? What are you, as a single, doing to prepare yourself for an eternal union, and to find a like-minded partner?


Roland Martin Website
Accessed October 26, 2007

CNN.COM,US Section,'Commentary: Saving Marriages Must be a National Priority', Roland Martin, October 24, 2007
Accessed October 26, 2007

CNN.COM,CNN Video Section,'Saving Marriages',Interview of Roland Martin by CNN Correspondent (not named),October 24, 2007
Accessed October 26, 2007

LDS Website,‘Divorce’,Dallin H. Oaks, Ensign, May 2007
Accessed October 26, 2007

LDS Website, ‘Enriching Your Marriage’,James E. Faust,Ensign, April 2007
Accessed October 26, 2007

LDS Website,‘The Women in Our Lives’,President Gordon B. Hinckley, Liahona, November 2004
Accessed October 26, 2007

LDS Website,‘What God Hath Joined Together’,President Gordon B. Hinckley,Ensign, May 1991
Accessed October 26, 2007

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