Photo by Chance Agrella
I am an introvert. Totally. Most people are genuinely surprised by this, and utter something to the effect of, "you don't seem shy".
A friend posted a link to this amazing short article on another site, and it truly sums up introverts. It explains me almost to a 'T'. It also explains that shyness and introversion are two different things.
Something else which explains me, and introversion, is also referred to in the article: the Myers-Briggs personality assessment.
According to the assessment, I am an INFJ. The 'I' is for 'Introverted'. One part of the explanation about the introversion of INFJs reads, "INFJs are deeply concerned about their relations with individuals as well as the state of humanity at large. They are, in fact, sometimes mistaken for extroverts because they appear so outgoing and are so genuinely interested in people -- a product of the Feeling function they most readily show to the world. On the contrary, INFJs are true introverts..."
Another interesting part of the article was its reference to 'giftedness' and introverts, "a minority in the regular population but a majority in the gifted population."
I am a firm believer in using good personality assessments and other tools to help understand the person you are involved with, and yourself; in the interest of developing the insight, tools, and skills needed to create and improve upon a beautiful and lasting relationship. I think there is great validity and usefulness with the Myers-Briggs assessment.
Understanding my own personality assessment helps me to better understand my own inherent strengths and weaknesses, and also to explain them to others. If I know the assessment of another, I can read up on what that means, and then better understand how best to relate to that person, and what things I need to learn to be more understanding or tolerant of.
I also subscribe to the principles of Dr. Gary Chapman's Love Languages and Apology Languages. A 30-Second (or less) assessment for BOTH is available online HERE.
I have found a tremendous benefit to understanding the love languages of others as it allows me to have the ability to give them my love and affection in the way in which they feel it and understand it. It is important also to understand that within each love language there are a plethora of 'dialects', so it is crucial that you also discern the dialect of the person, as well. Some free 'tools' regarding love languages may be downloaded HERE, and specific focus on the love languages and how it relates to couples may be further investigated HERE.
Apology languages are just as important to know, as in every relationship there will always be times when we will need to make amends. Knowing what the other person needs so they can feel our remorse is a good thing. It makes the apology process simpler and far more effective.
So, what personality assessments do you like, and how have they helped or hurt you and your relationships?
Like what I wrote and want to buy me a cherry coke?